Ripping off a post I just saw in the Isaac Arthur subreddit. Imagining we work out the technical ability. Examples they suggested were:

  • No periods
  • No balding
  • No nausea
  • No body odor
  • Resistance to obesity and muscle wasting
  • confluenceEnglish
    1071·
    2 年前

    Redesign the spine for vertical use. Don’t put the eating and breathing tubes on either side of the same flap.

    • foggy
      332·
      2 年前

      We should have tons of little breathing holes all over.

      Imagine if no one snored?

      • roguetrick@kbin.social
        26·
        2 年前

        While you can create spiracles that repel polar substances like water, you cannot protect them against surfactant like soap. No more showers unless you want to drown.

          • roguetrick@kbin.social
            8·
            2 年前

            You can waterboard them with it. If you want to effectively kill them, I’d recommend using the tried and true neurotoxin option sold at your local grocery store. You can be your own Saddam Hussein without having to hide in the most random places after committing your war crimes.

          • jennwiththesea
            2·
            2 年前

            Wasps, definitely, and it does basically suffocate them. We use a water, dish soap, and peppermint mix on paper wasp nests that form in our eaves.

        • foggy
          6·
          2 年前

          Yeah but we would have probably made weird body suits to deal with that by now if it were that big a deal.

          We’re really, really bad at preventing problems, but were the best problem solvers we’ve ever found.

          Seems just about every other animal is great at preventing problems. We’re the opposite.

        • theneverfox@pawb.socialEnglish
          1·
          2 年前

          Not necessarily. I’m far from sold on the idea, but lungs are able to take in enough oxygen to hyperventilate easily, clothes would reduce the maximum air intake to some extent, but from l full capacity would be max you need to breathe to max out your muscles - everything past that would be excess capacity

          If we’re going for redundancy and throughput, clothes probably would be more useful as a filter than being a limiter (and filtration is why I’m not on board with this design)

  • hperrin
    69·
    2 年前

    Ability to go to sleep when sleep should be gone to.

    • Alteon
      35·
      2 年前

      Or the ability to forgo sleep indefinitely. I’ve got too much shit I want to do and too little time.

      • Rhynoplaz
        32·
        2 年前

        Let’s apply RPG sleep rules.

        You can go for weeks without sleep, but when you do sleep, you awaken fully healed.

      • 200ok
        1·
        2 年前

        Nothing beats the feeling of waking up after a good sleep.

        How about, you only need naps and you always wake up feeling refreshed.

        AND ONLY DREAM ABOUT PUPPIES AND SUNSHINE!

  • recursive_recursion [they/them]@programming.devEnglish
    581·
    2 年前

    RFC, pull request to add git.

    Reasoning: Having a built-in versioning system would allow humans to rollback roll back undesirable changes and advancements could be made more easily

    please comment or downvote if this is a bad idea

  • Paranomaly@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
    462·
    2 年前

    Let’s put a cap on how much excess energy the body can store as fat. Sure, some amount is fine and has a number of uses, but just let me poop some excess calories out. I’d only need more if I were to hibernate.

    Thinking on it, I want to hibernate too, please.

    While we’re at it from animals, how about upping some of our regeneration? Teeth don’t regrow? Naw, constant regen please. I get too big of a cut and I get a scar? Let’s let everything regrow from being lost if you can survive without it. Also why doesn’t the brain heal? Most important part of the body and each crack’s there for life. Let me get my serotonin back already, slacker.

    Also what’s with this getting assigned a gender thing? You don’t even get to know what it means before you have one! And then we build society as if this coin flip was the seed to the tree of life. Let people choose and switch naturally, please and thank you.

  • fury
    42·
    2 年前

    No more biting down on my tongue or cheeks when eating. Most annoying glitch ever.

    • Bakachu
      3·
      2 年前

      Omg yes this absolutely. I eat to nourish myself and survive and am punished randomly by self-inflicted mouth wound that lasts for days/weeks => evolutionary failure at its finest.

      Insult to injury when the food is actually something healthy like a salad instead of fries.

  • RampageDon
    431·
    2 年前

    Hair and nails not constantly growing

    Your body not over reacting to things (allergies and auto immune)

    • foggy
      22·
      2 年前

      Hunger annoys me.

      Like, yo, tummy: I have not failed to feed you in over 30 years. Maybe don’t cause me physical pain and nausea? A simple grumble is fine until it gets actually serious, ok?

      • kase
        7·
        2 年前

        goes a few hours without eating

        Tummy: panik

        A simple grumble would be perfect. Sometimes I get really hungry annoyingly quickly, and other times I don’t get hungry and go way too long before remembering to eat. It’d be really great if I could just program my body to just give me a lil popup reminder after a certain number of hours.

      • stingpie
        5·
        2 年前

        Sometimes strokes can destroy the area of the brain that controls hunger. They require alarms to consistently eat, sleep, etc. I remember one story about a guy who put all these alarms on his watch. One day, his watch runs out of batteries, so his alarms stop completely. A couple days later, he calls the hospital because he couldn’t get out of bed. Turns out he hadn’t eaten anything the whole time. In short, you’ll probably forget to eat without any signal you have to.

      • theneverfox@pawb.socialEnglish
        2·
        2 年前

        I will tell you, it’s not that hard to train your body to treat hunger differently. You just need to fast now and then, most religions have guidelines for this. It doesn’t take much to give you hunger resistance, and it makes a huge difference… You become less affected by low blood sugar and able to ignore hunger when you need to

        After your body adjusts, hunger becomes cyclical - you feel hungry, maybe even nauseous, but then it goes away after a couple minutes. If you’re doing something, it’s so easy to ignore you forget about it

    • Che Banana@lemmy.ml
      12·
      2 年前

      Right? Im very cool with rhe whole balding thing but for fuck sake can I not be Chewbacca walking carpet from the neck down?

    • Phil_in_here@lemmy.ca
      12·
      2 年前

      So you want hair and nails to grow consciously?

      Like if I want to grow my hair out, I need to actively concentrate on it for a year? Or can I grunt out a moustache like a cartoon? Both are problematic.

      • xigoi@lemmy.sdf.org
        6·
        2 年前

        You consciously initiate the process and then it grows on its own, with the option to manually stop.

        • kase
          1·
          2 年前

          Ooh can I be Rapunzel/Wolverine? Both at the same time, that is. Oh and I’ll take Dumbledore’s beard.

      • theneverfox@pawb.socialEnglish
        1·
        2 年前

        I would like the ability to change the speed of growth. Like, when you overeat, I’d love to just crank up hair and nail growth to burn away the excess

  • halloween_spooksterEnglish
    411·
    2 年前
    • Separate holes for eating and breathing
    • Separate sewage system from entertainment complex
    • Remove mental health disorders
    • Improved empathy
    • L4rr
      81·
      2 年前

      Good day, are you talking about urine sewage system and/or anal intercourse?

      • Olhonestjim
        7·
        2 年前

        How about a system which fully harvests nutrients, then compresses waste into smooth, solid, compact, sterile pellets which leave no residue and don’t smell bad?

        • L4rr
          2·
          2 年前

          Well, one can hardly argue with that, kind sir.

    • Bakachu
      2·
      2 年前

      I disagree - one hole for everything. Just imagine how many less medical clinics you need to go to.

      Yes, I’m American.

  • nucleativeEnglish
    31·
    2 年前

    The breathing hole and the eating hole are separated

      • DrRatso@lemmy.ml
        101·
        2 年前

        You can not have a cure for cancer, but a cancer. I promise I am not trying to be pedantic here. Cancers are so different from one another, that a single cure for breast cancer might not even work on all breast cancer.

          • Bakachu
            2·
            2 年前

            This is so fucked up but yeah I can see them settling for research on a drug or treatment that just keeps you from reaching Stage 4 to where you become a lifelong consumer of said medical company.