• superweeniehutjrs
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    96
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    2 years ago

    Can I claim my “babies” as dependents on my taxes, hypothetically?

    • Flying SquidOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      84
      ·
      2 years ago

      Yes, however, if you or your partner menstruates, it’s manslaughter.

      • Ignotum
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        33
        ·
        2 years ago

        Is it only the eggs that count as babies or sperm as well?
        If they do then I may be one of the biggest mass murderers in history

        • ProstheticBrain@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          23
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          2 years ago

          I think the ruling covers embryos, so a fertilized egg.

          Either on their own are zygotes, so don’t count as citizens or whatever the fuck is going on in Alabama.

        • theangryseal
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          14
          ·
          2 years ago

          I haven’t done much killing in the last 10 years or so, but when I was a teenager I slaughtered millions multiple times a day and stuffed them into small sacks and buried them in the trash. My drive to kill has slowed down significantly.

          My mom thought the washing machine was eating those little sacks.

            • theangryseal
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              3
              ·
              2 years ago

              Haha, I’m sure she did.

              My son, gross little bastard, he’d stuff them in places he expected no one to look. Like, bud, we gonna clean that far flung corner eventually.

              I had to have a talk with him. You gonna murder millions? You gotta do it like Dennis Nilsen. If you can’t do it like Nilsen, you at least need to do like your old man and put that nasty shit in the trash. :p

        • Flying SquidOP
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          7
          ·
          2 years ago

          I don’t know, there’s a lot of competition out there if you’re right. You’ve got around 4 billion competitors.

    • killeronthecorner
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      46
      ·
      edit-2
      2 years ago

      If you can find a way to oppress women with the rebate, you’ll have their support.