• 10 Posts
  • 314 Comments
Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: May 31st, 2024

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  • Wouldn’t it be nice to share a hobby or personal interest with someone you are romantically and sexually involved in, too?

    I’ve had a lot of different hobbies over the past ~ 10 years, some for a shorter and some for a longer time. Not once has that resulted in a genuine romantic connection. Not even a date.

    On the other hand, I have had a lot of success finding romantic partners both on dating apps and in bars. All of the partners I’ve found that way have been at least somewhat likeminded and I’ve shared interests and hobbies with them. On an app, you see the person’s interests in the profile, in a bar you can talk to them and find out whether you have something in common.

    Maybe it’s against the etiquette to seek out romantic partners at hobby events around here (a nordic country). Maybe I just personally don’t like doing that. Either way, I totally understand if somebody wants to date in spaces that specifically cater to that.


  • I would say no. While they make the process more superficial and gamify it to the gain of the companies rather than the users, lots of people find partners on dating apps. A quick google reveals that already in 2017 dating apps were the leading way couples originally met.

    So I would at least try them, just keep in mind how they work and what the incentives are. And don’t take it personally if you don’t get a lot of matches - that happens to a lot of people. Also I would definitely not pay for a subscription, that’s the scam part.











  • fuck science and evidence

    Most science about human behavior deals with averages. It’s completely possible that a subpopulation might show an inverse trend. This is especially the case when it’s a subpopulation with known differences in similar behavior. I’m not saying ADHD people benefit from multitasking, but we just can’t say anything based on the general population.

    And for another anecdote, literally nobody I know who has ADHD is loved at their job for having it. They all struggle to hold jobs.

    A friend of mine is excelling at sales and that is due to his personality, including ADHD. In most jobs, of course, it’s not beneficial and can pose problems. But that doesn’t mean you can’t find jobs that are well-suited for ADHD people – maybe even better suited than for neurotypicals.