Sometimes we don’t value stable career or steady income as highly as other pursuits.
I wouldn’t say it’s not intelligent. Just different priorities.
I admire anyone brave and idealistic enough to commit to academia or culture or any similarly less lucrative and extremely uncertain path. Takes some resilience and big balls. You are almost guaranteed to lose a lot of the comforts available to others with that. And yet, they still do it. And we are all better for it. The world is better for it.
That has to be one of the worst choices if you must go. I get that we don’t think straight in those moments of our life, but it’s such a horrible thing to force on someone and their conscience…
Not just trains, but all the instances where someone entirely unrelated will be dragged into something so heavy, like truck drivers, too. Hard to live with, can really ruin lives.
Another thing I don’t like is when others that aren’t trained for it like the paramedics or police, have to see the outcome and fallout, such as jumping off a building into a busy street, even at night when nobody’s there just now, but will be. Or hanging yourself from your balcony in an apartment complex.
It fucks up someone to see that, and I have to believe everyone could make the responsible choice of doing it in private or in a way that affects least amount of unrelated people possible. Like going with the helium/nitrogen bag, hanging within the bounds of one’s privacy, if shooting is the way to go, do it perhaps in the woods, somewhere peaceful and remote, and call the paramedics so they’ll be there before any innocent walkers-by, etc.
It’s bad that anyone has to be involved, but at least the professionals have the training to deal with that somehow, even if it will ultimately fuck them up too at least somehow. At least it’s a conscious choice for them to put themselves in the position that they might have to see shit like that. Same for police.
I would strongly encourage messless ways to go, too, because I think the psychological impact of a peacful-seeming exit without blood or injuries has to be the least damaging. It’s never going to be clean and harmless to others, but an exit bag would do a lot of good for everyone eventually involved in the situation.
But I also get that a lot of people in that position may harbor some general hatred and bitterness towards others, which is horrible and I have to think entirely avoidable if the society did its job, so they might even choose to go as publicly and messily as possible just to make a point or something.
But the others have to live with that shit. They keep going. You don’t. The least we can do is try to minimize the trauma and impact we necessarily inflict on others when we do go. We get the peace. We get away. Those others, not so much.
I don’t know how this would be taught other than boldly and empathetically talking about it in school, to make the point repeatedly, like we do with sex education for example. And health education too. We really should talk about these things, so when the time comes one has to leave, the spine reaction would be to do it as kindly as possible, to be considerate in the choice of manner.
And here I am thinking everyone can do this, it’s so weird that a thing like this just never came up with anyone
This is so interesting, since I simply can not tell a difference between the aspartame/acesulfane and actual sugar in fizzy drinks. I guess I have it easy because of that, but I have a somewhat keen sense of taste otherwise, I cook a lot and can detect what the taste is missing or has too much of pretty consistently, and know the “opposite” tastes/ingredients to apply. And wines and such, it’s sort of a synesthesia thing too, since I kind of feel them as something close to colors. But sweet things I have trouble with. I thought, not sure why, this was a human thing, but it’s interesting to hear someone can detect the sweet things granularly! Cool!
I occasionally have these spells where I forget what I’ve previously learnt, and choose to try to let an ai help me out with some particularly boring code, think something mundane but laborous. So I succumb to the temptation.
And every fucking time I come out having wasted time and still having to do the thing, or at any rate, something equally boring and mundane, myself manually, because either the result is so ridiculous that it requires extensive cleanup/refactoring or just won’t get there at all.
And each time I merrily keep forgetting this, learn nothing from it beyond the short term, because I seem to be hardwired to try and skip the boring stuff.
There’s no escaping the boring stuff.
Thing is, what these models really do, is give a small dose of escapism under a fragile illusion of productivity, so for a moment there you feel good, “released”, though only postponing the boring fucking work and annoying your future self.
But that escapism sells well, because we yearn it. Same with entertainment. Games. The escape from mundane, boring and annoyingly repetitive life.
For a method of escapism, it’s so fucking inefficient and resource-intensive, we should punch ourselves in the dick just for falling for that each time.
While having this mindset, knowing rationally what I know, I still expect to fall for it in the medium term again, because fuck me if some work just isn’t boring.
And every time the excursion leaves me feeling so ashamed and dirty, I truly would deserve a punch right in the dick. And perhaps need one, to actually make this stick…
I’ve not heard a single capable person ever come out of using the current agents, or “ai”s in general, and not have ended up just wasting time and resources and feeling dirty and embarrassed for it.
The only thing good about them is the potential, which, at least currently, never materializes.
Yeah. The same goes for the friend, as for OP: Masking and how automatic it becomes makes it hard to really approximate how bad anyone has it. Add to that the fact that OP almost definitely doesn’t see the friend 24/7, but only on social occasions, which would usually mean they haven’t seen much else other than the mask. So of course they’d think they don’t have it as bad as them, because we can only ever live inside our own skin.
I feel like gatekeeping like this is a net negative. I don’t even know why one would care about how others have it. It sure feels like OP has an unhealthy need to be the worst off, and while the reason for that is very likely completely understandable and human, it’s still harmful behavior and an unproductive mindset to have. For everyone involved, OP too.
However, there’s one thing there that is just annoying. The “everyone has adhd” line just serves to undermine adhd and its effects on any individual, it makes it seem like nothing. Which is also not the case, and actively harmful to the treatment and management of it.
I think a lot of the attributes relevant to adhd are a scale, and we all have them in varying amounts, but the same goes for the amount of tumors in our body and the microbiome in our gut. The fact that it is a scale does not take away the fact that some people are, necessarily, if we agree it’s a scale and not a binary, at the higher end of that scale and will have problems living with that. And that’s I think what’s the most important part: whether or not it negatively affects one’s life. Especially day-to-day life. There are benign tumors in everyone’s body pretty much. But for some, the tumors are either of a dangerous type or too big, or there are too many of them… we respect that and don’t go saying “well everyone has them” when someone has cancer. The same should go for adhd I think. So in that aspect I do get OP’s frustration.
However, I wouldn’t go ahead and gatekeep “true” adhd from them just because they happen to have a bad take on this specific thing.
As long as they don’t hamper mods or modding too much, then yes, sorta. The de facto experience for many is the modded experience. Which is often leagues above vanilla. Maybe they can’t ship a good thing out of the box, but they leave reasonable tools out for people to make the thing actually good.
But of course it shouldn’t be like that. Unfortunately it is. But if you think of the games as sandboxes for modders, and expect nothing more, then in a sense I guess, they do deliver.
But it takes years for the mods to mature and the games to reach actually reasonable prices for what they are.
Personally it gives me peace from the constant everything. The drops pull my attention and it’s all over, so I can relax and just feel it all, not all all. Not sure if that makes sense. It just gives some peace and escape from life and all its noise.
But I’ve personally found that the warmth isn’t a thing for me, it works just as well when it’s very middling or even a bit cold. So in my shame I’ve long since switched from warm ones to those around the 25c ballpark, it’s given me even more peace ever since. Warming the water up is the most consuming part.
But then again I’m from a culture with saunas everywhere, in every house, so I don’t really need showers for the warmth anyway, the relaxing and muscle tension relieving I get from sauna. The overall stimulating peace and silence is what my showers are for. In addition to washing and grooming, of course.
Let’s form a wizard school
Oh it’s not useless. Each time people go to the streets, it lowers the bar to do it next time too. Dancing frogs and that kind of things might lower the initial barrier for some, and from there it just gets easier to organize in general too.
It’s not immediately useful, but this improves the will and tendency to organize. And shows the strong nature of solidarity, of standing together.
One day it’ll be extremely beneficial that a lot more people have lower barriers to join the other people in the streets. The US isn’t that far from their own Maidan experience starting to feel nigh.
I wish our DM had real-life message to telepathically convey stuff to just one person.
In my group there would be literal zero chance of the others not listening to me if I ever threw a “hmm why is that wire there”, because they would’ve heard the dm either tell me due to passive perception or had me throw a roll and then tell me. So they know it’s a trap no matter if I want to rp it. Every time I get frustrated and question it, there’s this one guy who always has the reasoning and justifying at hand why they would know to do the right thing and to be fair they kind of make sense always, but there’s zero chance he’d come up with that just by my rp line alone without knowing for a fact it’s a trap.
I think that’s the worst kind of meta gaming. They are fully blind to the meta gaming there and just do it by instinct. And when you try and question, they always have a defense ready, even if it’s so wildly specific and unlikely but you can’t really fault it because they’re not stupid, the justifications hold, it’s just that the only way they habitually generate them is because they know what I know despite they couldn’t in-game know.
Like I’ve occasionally just left the thing unsaid in-game out of frustration and just reason to DM that there’s so much going on, my focus instantly switched to another thing and I forgot because I’m not very smart. So we all know there’s a trap but now nobody has told this to the others.
What do they do? The one guy fucking always comes up with some shit like “hmmm be wary, they must’ve laid traps here, hey you with good investigation, please look around and see if there’s one in this specific place for some reason” and the rolls of course often succeed because they always choose to best one to solve that.
But from rp perspective, we’ve walked this path for a while, and this thought only came up now, that it might be trapped? Just right now when you know, outside of the game, that there’s a trap?
I call bullshit and it frustrates me so much, there’s very little chance of anything interesting ever happening in-game because we seldom miss anything or do the wrong things, because “somehow” we always happen to do the right things no matter who notices things in-game or rolls or whatever, no matter how much any of us attempt to rp it, somebody just meta games it without it being explicitly or admittedly meta gaming and gets all defensive when questioned and because they now know everything, can figure out an explanation the DM can do nothing but accept because it makes sense, now that they know to pull the right shit out their ass.
Ugh. It’s not even a big deal, our group is fun and the adventuring isn’t bad, these things don’t happen often enough for it to really affect things, but god do I hate it. This ended up being a rant, I didn’t even know how much I get frustrated with it until I just now read this back. Jesus…
To be fair, while I’ve never seen or know anyone circumcised, at least around here we shower after exercise and sports and stuff. We never had separated showers in schools or sports halls or gyms or similar, you’d obviously see everyone’s dick very often if you ever participated in any activity that’s sweaty. But then again we also have a very long and strong sauna tradition, which only increases the genital-seeing vectors in everyone’s life.
I think it only natural, why should anyone be ashamed or somehow hide their natural body is beyond me. I think it’s also healthy in terms of normalizing the fact that we all have a body, skin, genital, and we all come in differences shapes and sizes and all.
But I do find it similarly weird to ever bully anyone over a thing like that. Anybody too distracted by, or otherwise focused on, someone else’s body parts is probably having some issues themselves that ought to be resolved.
I have never met anyone circumcised before, nor even heard of one outside of celebrities and internet randoms like this.
So the thing about some being grossed out is purely cultural and not a universal thing. I find it odd that some would be grossed out about a thing like that, but if you choose to remain within that culture, it’s probably sensible to account for that. But I would bet it’s really not a big deal for anyone despite what they say. There are more important things going on whenever people end up in a situation where that comes up. I wouldn’t worry about that, but the again I don’t know your culture, maybe it is a big deal.
For me personally, I really like my “hood” so to say. Keeps the senses more heightened there when the delicate part does not chafe around and touch everything all the time. On top of that, I find much more hygienic to have a natural “shield” that is easy to clean and keep regulated in terms of pH and all. No doubt it would be more problematic in hot climates where there might be more sweating and stuff, that would require more intense and frequent upkeep, but here in the global North, I think it would be disadvantageous not to have the natural luxury.
Not only would I not want a circumsization, I find it actively harmful to myself and my personal health. I also find the practice extremely off-putting and horrifying, but then again all cultures come with their own “barbaric” traditions so to say, so I’m not about to yuck anyone’s yum. You do you, I say, live your best life.
It does come with some required upkeep and work, but so do our teeth. If you maintain them, they’re going to be healthy and beneficial overall. No need to cut them off in my opinion, just because it’s extra work. But that’s not the justification for the cut, so I also don’t mean to sound patronizing here. Just my view on it.
If I never understand how and why but I get to have that be the case then I am content.
This is a sane way to look at it, I think, so I commend you for staying so rational in face of something so unfortunate and life-changing.
I wish the best of luck to you, it seems you know what you are doing and my input was unwarranted. But I hope you see I was coming from a good place, even if the help was both unasked for and redundant. It’s not always the case, since ketogenic diet has found some popularity that has led it to trend a little bit among those not so inclined to actually read up on the topic or consider its consequences fully. Which is why I tend to offer my two cents when I happen upon the topic, even if I’m not an expert in the subject matter
Really appreciate the comment, thank you. Since I’ve had some education via my dietician and personal progress/experience, I’ve wanted to give my thoughts in case it helps. But here it seems you are much better up to date with these, and I’ve also got new perspective and reading from this. So thanks, again, especially for challenging my suggestions when it’s often risky here in internet as you’d often get negative pushback and most wouldn’t bother to subject themselves to that.
Monitoring personal health metrics is also helpful, especially lipids, ketones, glucose, fasting insulin, etc…
For whoever might be wondering about all this, I believe a lot of these can be tested from blood alone, which means it’s fairly fast and cheap. At least here, but here we have the benefit of a socialist democracy and its welfare system, I.e healthcare is essentially free. So especially if the latter applies to you too, you will not do any harm checking up on your levels from time to time!
For me, just a completely unrelated blood draw revealed problems with my blood glucose before it ever got to diabetes, and also revealed some (luckily minor) damage to my liver due to fatty liver. Which meant I was able, just by accidentally doing blood tests for something else, avoid these things getting worse and irreparable, and as it happens, ketogenic diet is very good for the latter (fatty liver, perhaps inner fat in general I think?), and fortunately in my case, it didn’t worsen the former either, so I managed to avoid the need for potentially expensive meds just by doing some diet education and changes, it was monitored full keto in the short term and later I was advised to return to more normal diet but with strictly reduced carbs so as to not let the problems resurface.
Just all to illustrate how just simple and quick tests like this can be accidentally good. I didn’t display any problems outwards, so I had no idea I was slowly sliding towards pre-diabetes and liver cirrchosis (really not sure how to spell that in English but I hope the word is similar and close enough).
And when doing any bigger diet changes, it’ll be good to have a baseline from before it, to compare against at different points of the diet.
Oh, this is new to me. If that is true, then that would still require balancing, since saturated fats come with other problems themselves. I suppose there’s no “clean” way to do anything at any rate, so it takes personal testing and monitoring. But I am fully willing to accept my recommendations might be outdated or misguided, and what you say is correct. It has been a while since I was on an overseen keto diet and things do change in time with new research and guidelines. To that end, I’d recommend checking out if that is indeed true, and if the new recommendations/consensus would make my point moot.
Either way, the fiber was a strong point when I was taught the diet by my doctor and a dietitian, and I can’t see that having changed. As far as I’m aware, fiber is a critical component of our gut health but also immune system robustness. And done right, it does nothing to affect the energy sourcing or glucose levels or whatever. I was given the rough guide of overall carbs - fibers = “final” carbs ingested. Not really sure how to translate that into English but I think it’s a common rule of thumb and you get the gist. Has that changed since?
But I’ll end on this note: Whatever I or someone say here on internet, best to double-check it all with your dietitian if doing an overseen diet, and yourself from internet if you’re doing it on your own.
Nutrition and health are no small things to play with. Our body is flexible and can survive a whole lot, in a lot of different situations, but there are prerequisites for it to thrive in a sustainable way. And there’s a fundamental distinction between just surviving/existing and thriving/being healthy.
On a keto based diet, you’ll need those fats. Perhaps consider something like sunflower oil instead though? Nuts also come with plenty of fats and have a lot of fiber too. Some have carbs more than others, so you’d have to check which ones fit your specific diet, but these are a great source of healthy fats and help keeping the gut biomes working well.
Edit: just to add, you could experiment with the fiber more. Long carbs have a very different effect on the body vs. short ones, so those, in moderation to keep the keto state up, could be okay for the partner too, and perhaps give more robustness/variety to the diet?
While I don’t agree, I’ll concede I might be in the minority with this stand. But I don’t really believe in a universal intelligence in the first place. There are several, and not all of them are self-serving or marked by the traditionally associated emotionless calculations. There’s emotional intelligence. Social intelligence. And so on.
I don’t pretend to be a philosopher or a psychologist to say what they all are, what they even are if you get down to it, but I do know there’s intelligence in caring for others. There’s intelligence in many kinds of sacrifice too. They just aren’t the classical kind of universal intelligence, because that is defined by self-serving “cold facts” and a fragile attempt at realizing an objective world and objective stance on it, which one can never truly reach or possess. If something like that even is possible.
I stand by my original comment, and I’ll be a bit sad to learn if I’m the odd one out with that take, but I also think these are the kind of things philosophers ought to talk about and not me. What do I know? Maybe my view is distorted by idealism and good expectations, faith in people and the world, that may well be unsubstantiated and entirely delusional.